HikerTrash, Part 3

Here are some more great tips for becoming even more hiker trashy…

this is a snack. crave it and dream about it.


drink a nice beverage like this pear cider only when it’s a gift from a trail angel.


eat your greens

drool when you see the golden arches. do not be ashamed; you are Pavlov’s dog.

eat meat dicks

bacon, sausage, ham, egg, cheese. be hungry right after eating.

get loaded.

want desperately to eat hamburger cake but can’t afford it. yearn for it even now…

wild. lol. omg. fail to be amused when the umpteenth person asks if you are hiking because of it. bite a few well-meaning people’s heads off. #SorryNotSorry


think this is a sandwich. don’t understand why friends think it is funny.

oh yes…. kool aid! bwahahaha!

eat these. think they are tasty.

drink this. cow patties right next to the stream. pray feverishly to all deities that your filter does its job.

crave all the meat dicks. make bangers and mash in honor of some British hikertrash you just met.


trash bags are the new black.


there are donut dicks. who knew? this is a “cock and balls Boston cream.” eat the whole thing. #VoodooDoughnut

really, really, really appreciate trail magic! like so much it is beyond words.

this. all day. every fucking day.


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